On halloween me and my friends dressed up as zombie school girls and well I got a bit to drunk and then on the taxi ride home I didn't realise i basically did a 'zombie photoshoot' for my friends camera. She has only just uploaded them on facebook and I look hideous. I look like a beast in some of them, and others my face looks fat and my arms and just I generally look disgusting. My makeup and outfit obviously isn't meant to look nice anyway but I just look like I've took it one step too far. I've tried making her delete them but no she just goes and tags me instead, you all probably think I'm being silly but I actually just burst into tears when she wouldn't delete them, I got so angry. I don't want people looking at them and I don't want to look at them, she say's I look funny but I'm not laughing. It's days like this that I get so close to self harming again, I just look at how revolting I look and just want to make me feel pain for allowing myself to look that way and actually allow someone to take pictures. I need to sort myself out. I need to find my way to how I want and need to look. And I will, food is the enemyy, food isn't going to help me find that route, all it's going to do is stop me.
xx
Sweety,
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean. I do not that your overreacting pictures are the worst thing. They just ruin everything. Try not to hurt yourself, I totally understand if you do. But remember you might feel the same tomorrow, and you´ll just end up with scars. still feeling as shitty as ever. We can stick this out, together. Lots of Love
Peace Out<3
There there darl. If they annoy you a lot, legally, she's not allowed to keep them up with your permission
ReplyDelete(in Australia anyway.) Yeah, it could be going a bit far, but I say this to my friends if there's something particularily horrid of me up and I can't stand to think that anyone would see it.
*without your permission, sorry.
ReplyDelete