If it was easy, everybody would be thin.

Weighed myself the morning and am down another 2lbs since Monday. It feels like I am getting addicted, not so much to not eating because that has come easier than I thought but too losing weight. Im so eager and determined to see the number on the scales go down each time I'm on it. It's then opposite at the gym when I fight and fight to get the calories burnt number on the machines to go up, I am starting to feel obsessed.

Me being me I ruined my fast when I got in today from college and I don't know what made me go straight to the fridge and I opened a packet of ham and had 2 slices which is only 47 calories altogether but then that made me eat a packet of smokey bacon crisps. Literally shoving the crisps in my mouth so quick. Afterwards I just felt sick and when straight to the bathroom but it took me ages to get anything out, I usually find it easy to purge but this wasn't, felt like half my stomach acid had come flooding out just no food, eventually I got there. I still am pleased with a 42 hour fast, just next time I need to improve.

I have always wanted to lose weight, but never like this, I've never felt like it could actually happen. The motivation is different this time. I want to be able to lose so I can come on and tell you all and make me feel worthy. I want to get down to a number where I feel like I deserve a blog on here because I feel huge when I think of how much I weigh compared to some of you so I want to be able to feel accepted even though I already am starting to with comments from people, it does really help to know others are behind me, keeping me strong.

I will carry on doing what I need to do. I don't want food..I don't need food..food is for the weak.
I'm strong, WE are strong, we can do it.

Do not give up what you most want for what you want at the moment.

Starve on ladies ♥